Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Exhausted and sad

I don't know if it's because I was gone from home for so long and I'm so far behind, or if it's all of the changes and stresses in our lives catching up to me, but I'm feeling really overwhelmed and pessimistic right now.

I want to be an optimist. I'm trying to use the language of optimism on myself. I'm trying to meditate. I'm trying to take action to fix those things that seem broken, in my home, myself, my relationships.

I'm just exhausted and I feel like I'm fighting a losing battle.

Ugh.

I'll get over it. I always do, don't I? I'm faking it pretty well. But at the end of the day, I just feel sad.

Back to the therapist.

2 comments:

Jenny Ward said...

kristina.....when can we talk?

look back through your blog - easy to see why the exhausted part and one thing after another and as busy as the last weeks and months have been - sad is sure to follow -

love you

Sue said...

Kristina, there is this program I used to be involved with (radiantrecovery.com) and they talked about "Day 4" - that when we have a beta-endorphin spike, which comes from something good or bad happening to us, it can often affect us on a neurochemical level about 4 days later. Looks as if what you're going through is roughly 4 days after you got home, so it's not surprising (to me) that you'd be going through this now. (That's the simplistic version - I can explain more in person if you're interested.) Hopefully the therapist can help, plus your friends are here for you too!

I hope you're feeling better now than when you first posted this. Let's make some plans to get together for coffee (or something) when you have some time - I know we've been talking about planning that for months.