Tuesday, January 13, 2009


So yesterday morning I was on top of the world and ready to prove it; yesterday afternoon I hit the wall (couch).

This morning I still feel tired and not refreshed - arghhhhhhh! I changed the day around, so I canceled attending covenant group, I called my mom and asked her to come over this afternoon after Tessa's off school, and I had Ryan drive Tessa and Pascal to school (it was my day to carpool).

I am tired, and annoyed, by all of this. I'm trying to be my new, improved self and instead I am a patient, and an impatient one at that.

Adding insult to injury for all of this is that I am "supposed" to be fully operational at this point (just modified activities in terms of weight and exercise restrictions). An exchange surgery is "no big deal" for many girls. I'm used to being the super-healer, and I don't like being the slow girl. I don't like it at all.

In my own defense, I think it's a lot harder for the body to heal from surgery #10 than it is from surgery #1. And in addition to the exchange, the doc had to remove an awful lot of scar tissue and encapsulation, and that is painful stuff...much more than the "standard" I believe.

My body is just beat up. And I'm feeling it.

So today, my goal is to have a shower. To change my clothes. Now isn't that exciting....argh. Maybe if I'm quiet all day, tomorrow I'll feel a surge of energy that will stick around.

I'm waiting.

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