Day one, hour 3 of Weight Watchers.
How do I do this.....hmmmm!
I'm remembering a few things.
Breakfast is important.
Lattes are really good snacks because the milk protein is filling (and they're only 2 points).
Scones (a weakness of mine) are a rare treat.
Time to break out the Weight Watchers cookbooks - tonight I'll make a family favorite (chicken souvlaki: I have all of the ingredients at home, thanks to our herb garden).
I need to plan picnic lunches for when we're out and about so that I don't fall into the "oh well there's nothing else to eat" trap and end up eating something calorie-ridden.
I can do this! I just have to get back in the good habits....
I weighed myself this morning. Oh, it was terrible. But maybe I have water weight...? ;-)
Showing posts with label health. Show all posts
Showing posts with label health. Show all posts
Monday, June 02, 2008
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
Flying Solo
Today I visited with my wonderful therapist (psychiatrist, to be more precise) Dr. Baer for the last time. Dr. Baer is moving to another state, and I for one am sad to see her go. She has been instrumental in helping me to learn and grow and come to new levels of acceptance about my path, and I am extraordinarily grateful to her.
I am going to miss her.
I am trying to reach the acceptance stage of my grief over the changes in my life that have occured since my diagnosis. I am trying to move on, recognizing that I am forever changed, and accepting those changes.
Some of those changes are physical. I am coming to terms, very slowly, with the fact that my reconstruction is not going well, and may never go well. Perhaps if I did another ten surgeries I could get to the place I thought I'd get...but I don't have it in me. I am making the choice to stop having surgery after the next surgery, however flawed my results may be. I am not going to be whole, complete, and pieced back together physically. In order to become mentally whole, I am going to have to learn to accept these physical flaws.
I can no longer delude myself that "one day this will be better." I promised Tessa that one day Mommy would have new nipples, but I forgot to say "in the right place" or "nipples that actually protrude." I thought I'd have a matched pair of breasts - sisters, if not identical twins - but instead I have distant cousins who don't even appear to know one another. Of course, the next surgery (October) might improve those things, but I am no longer counting on that. Anything that goes right in that regard will be a bonus, not an expectation.
And the physical symptoms that go along with treatment....I am learning to accept them, too. I have hot flashes so bad that I soak the bedsheets and find myself shivering in my sweaty, wet pajamas, unable to sleep I'm so cold. I'm accepting that a normal part of my life needs to be changing my pajamas once or twice in the middle of the night, just to be able to sleep. I am accepting that I am permanently fatigued, requiring MUCH more sleep than I used to (10 hours a night no longer refreshes me). I am accepting that I can not lift my arm straight up in the air. I am accepting that whenever I lift something, I get a simultaneously dull-sharp (don't ask, I can't explain it) pain in my chest where the surgeries have occurred. I am accepting that my menopausal skin is dry, flakey, and prone to acne (you've gotta be kidding me! - wait, I'm supposed to be accepting here....). I am accepting that I am well on the way to osteoporosis.
Or am I? I'm not so sure. When I write about this list, I realize I have to stop before I remember the rest of the list (achy joints, thin eyebrows, new facial hair NOT in my eyebrows, a keloid (?) scar on my eye from the surgery to make nipples, difficulty opening jars or doing other simple tasks because of lost upper body strength/damage.....shall I keep going? there's more!) because I don't really accept it. Who could? But I'm trying. I am really, really trying. And I"m closer than I used to be.
(I can not yet learn to accept or embrace my forgetfulness. Mid-sentence, I lose track. I am told things, and I forget them. I have a harder time following complex ideas, or tracking lists of ideas, or even managing my calendar. This, I do not accept. "Chemobrain" implies chemo, and chemo ended 2.5 years ago for me. I am horribly disappointed in my lack of brainpower since chemo.)
People ask me, regularly, "How are you doing?" with that look of concern in their eyes. I try to answer truthfully, and I also try to be positive. I AM grateful to be alive - more grateful each day. I have overcome so much. I am grateful to be out of the worst parts of treatment. I am grateful to have whole weeks pass without doctor's appointments. I am grateful to have enough energy to be involved with things other than cancer.
I am grateful to be Tessa's mother, and to be Ryan's wife.
It's been almost three years. I am ready to move on to something new, and to take on different challenges, and to set aside the old challenges.
I am trying to be compassionate at myself, and to not judge myself too harshly that I have learned so little in three years. I am trying to be patient with myself that three long years have passed, but I still (mentally) reside in Cancerland. I am trying to be compassionate with myself so that I do not feel ashamed of my failure to escape Cancerland when so much is going well. I am trying to focus on the positive.
Tough stuff.
I am learning, though, and proud of that learning. My work on my personal environmental impact, my work in charity, my spiritual explorings, my involvement with community...all are part of finding my new normal.
Tonight Ryan's out having a bit of down time, and Tessa and I baked together after dinner: banana bread with chocolate chips (gotta use those bananas!), herb garlic bread (a nice change of pace from the whole wheat flax bread we're so used to), and strawberry jam popovers. Tessa helped to measure, stir, and blend, and got to sample the popovers for dessert. We had PEPS in the morning, and this afternoon Tessa went to preschool while I visited the doc. After preschool, we had some friends over for a playdate (and they brought their puppy, who looks just like Shep did when he was small).
Lots to be grateful for. I have moved ahead; despite my frustration with fatigue, I couldn't have managed this one day two and a half years ago.
I will miss Dr. Baer; she is bright, articulate, and compassionate, and she has helped me so much. I wish her well in her new adventures with family.
Wish me well without her - I've done so much growing in the past six months, I hope that I can keep momentum without her guidance.
Kristina
(PS Yes, I'll find another therapist. But those who follow me know that I've had TERRIBLE luck with therapists. They're expensive, and some have been harmful more than helpful. When I have to, I"ll find a new one. But right now it's too much effort.)
I am going to miss her.
I am trying to reach the acceptance stage of my grief over the changes in my life that have occured since my diagnosis. I am trying to move on, recognizing that I am forever changed, and accepting those changes.
Some of those changes are physical. I am coming to terms, very slowly, with the fact that my reconstruction is not going well, and may never go well. Perhaps if I did another ten surgeries I could get to the place I thought I'd get...but I don't have it in me. I am making the choice to stop having surgery after the next surgery, however flawed my results may be. I am not going to be whole, complete, and pieced back together physically. In order to become mentally whole, I am going to have to learn to accept these physical flaws.
I can no longer delude myself that "one day this will be better." I promised Tessa that one day Mommy would have new nipples, but I forgot to say "in the right place" or "nipples that actually protrude." I thought I'd have a matched pair of breasts - sisters, if not identical twins - but instead I have distant cousins who don't even appear to know one another. Of course, the next surgery (October) might improve those things, but I am no longer counting on that. Anything that goes right in that regard will be a bonus, not an expectation.
And the physical symptoms that go along with treatment....I am learning to accept them, too. I have hot flashes so bad that I soak the bedsheets and find myself shivering in my sweaty, wet pajamas, unable to sleep I'm so cold. I'm accepting that a normal part of my life needs to be changing my pajamas once or twice in the middle of the night, just to be able to sleep. I am accepting that I am permanently fatigued, requiring MUCH more sleep than I used to (10 hours a night no longer refreshes me). I am accepting that I can not lift my arm straight up in the air. I am accepting that whenever I lift something, I get a simultaneously dull-sharp (don't ask, I can't explain it) pain in my chest where the surgeries have occurred. I am accepting that my menopausal skin is dry, flakey, and prone to acne (you've gotta be kidding me! - wait, I'm supposed to be accepting here....). I am accepting that I am well on the way to osteoporosis.
Or am I? I'm not so sure. When I write about this list, I realize I have to stop before I remember the rest of the list (achy joints, thin eyebrows, new facial hair NOT in my eyebrows, a keloid (?) scar on my eye from the surgery to make nipples, difficulty opening jars or doing other simple tasks because of lost upper body strength/damage.....shall I keep going? there's more!) because I don't really accept it. Who could? But I'm trying. I am really, really trying. And I"m closer than I used to be.
(I can not yet learn to accept or embrace my forgetfulness. Mid-sentence, I lose track. I am told things, and I forget them. I have a harder time following complex ideas, or tracking lists of ideas, or even managing my calendar. This, I do not accept. "Chemobrain" implies chemo, and chemo ended 2.5 years ago for me. I am horribly disappointed in my lack of brainpower since chemo.)
People ask me, regularly, "How are you doing?" with that look of concern in their eyes. I try to answer truthfully, and I also try to be positive. I AM grateful to be alive - more grateful each day. I have overcome so much. I am grateful to be out of the worst parts of treatment. I am grateful to have whole weeks pass without doctor's appointments. I am grateful to have enough energy to be involved with things other than cancer.
I am grateful to be Tessa's mother, and to be Ryan's wife.
It's been almost three years. I am ready to move on to something new, and to take on different challenges, and to set aside the old challenges.
I am trying to be compassionate at myself, and to not judge myself too harshly that I have learned so little in three years. I am trying to be patient with myself that three long years have passed, but I still (mentally) reside in Cancerland. I am trying to be compassionate with myself so that I do not feel ashamed of my failure to escape Cancerland when so much is going well. I am trying to focus on the positive.
Tough stuff.
I am learning, though, and proud of that learning. My work on my personal environmental impact, my work in charity, my spiritual explorings, my involvement with community...all are part of finding my new normal.
Tonight Ryan's out having a bit of down time, and Tessa and I baked together after dinner: banana bread with chocolate chips (gotta use those bananas!), herb garlic bread (a nice change of pace from the whole wheat flax bread we're so used to), and strawberry jam popovers. Tessa helped to measure, stir, and blend, and got to sample the popovers for dessert. We had PEPS in the morning, and this afternoon Tessa went to preschool while I visited the doc. After preschool, we had some friends over for a playdate (and they brought their puppy, who looks just like Shep did when he was small).
Lots to be grateful for. I have moved ahead; despite my frustration with fatigue, I couldn't have managed this one day two and a half years ago.
I will miss Dr. Baer; she is bright, articulate, and compassionate, and she has helped me so much. I wish her well in her new adventures with family.
Wish me well without her - I've done so much growing in the past six months, I hope that I can keep momentum without her guidance.
Kristina
(PS Yes, I'll find another therapist. But those who follow me know that I've had TERRIBLE luck with therapists. They're expensive, and some have been harmful more than helpful. When I have to, I"ll find a new one. But right now it's too much effort.)
Monday, April 28, 2008
More commited than ever
We had a lovely weekend in Portland. Visiting "Grandma and Bopa" is always fun, and the train was a fun twist (and highly recommended).
While I was gone, I finished reading the David Wann book, and then I came home to a gift in the mail from Carolyn - a new book called, "Farewell, My Subaru" about a guy who decides to move to New Mexico and attempt to live an off-the-grid-petroleum-free lifestyle. (The title is because he has a beloved Subaru with 200,000 miles on it, but he decides to switch over to a giant truck....that runs on bio-diesel, aka vegetable grease, that he gets from fast food resturants.)
All of this reading has me more convinced than ever that I am okay with being "that nut" - the crazy lady who jumps societal ship to do things in new ways. I am more and more convinced that this is less "weird" and more "cutting edge" and that I am finding the wave of the future. My rationale?
- Our planet can not sustain the level of resource use and abuse that it currently takes. We're running out of petroleum (and sometimes paying $4/gallon for gas - ACK!), our water and air are polluted, our biodiversity is in jeopardy, and the things we take for granted are proving themselves to be in short supply.
- Our bodies can not sustain this level of abuse. Our bodies need clean air and water, for instance. And healthy food with vitamins built into it. Don't believe me? Look at cancer rates on the rise. Look at diabetes rates. Look at the rate of heart disease. You might be able to get away with it, and your body might keep you going....but for how long? And what will it take for us to stand up and notice that our bodies are crying out for help?
- We're not happy. Something is inherently wrong in a system where people feel disconnected from community, friends and family. We buy and buy and buy because "they" (marketing, corporations, and even governmental advertising that says "go out and boost the economy!") say it will make us happy. Well, national happiness levels are lower than ever. People are buying, but they're getting stuff, not happiness. Doesn't this tell us something?
- I'm starting to really "get" that we can live much better on our salary than we have been living. We can have all that we need - and more - and have money left over. We can eat well (organic, healthy food) and spend less. Money issues are stressful, and so my happiness increases when I reduce this stress. Much of our spending is bad for the environment (how do they manufacture that plastic stuff, anyway?), so less spending on "stuff" equals better environment, too.
Environment, bodies, happiness, money. All tied together...wow.
So here's what I want. I want to be happy. I want to breathe clean air, to drink clean water. I want to be healthy. I want to live within our means. That's it. The reason for my craziness is that I want these simple things.
Here's what I'm doing right now to get to where I'm going:
Plant a vegetable (and fruit!) garden. Such a simple thing, but it's giving me a lot:
- time outdoors to breathe fresh air and work my body
- fresh food that is as healthy as anything on the planet
- reduced carbon emissions - did you know that the average piece of food travels 2000 miles to get to your table? Well, my garden will travel about 20-40 feet to get to my table. By foot, not by gas powered vehicle, so not producing crap for the environment to deal with and for my body to deal with.
- a sense of well being. I'm not a gardener (au contraire), but I'm realizing that there is something meditative about working the soil, about doing this project as a family. I know what I'm doing and why. Simply put, it's satisfying. Amazing. All this satisfaction from seeds?!
- Improved biodiversity. I'm not buying seeds from Monsanto, I'm buying heirloom vegetables. Why? Because the biodiversity of crops is falling annually, and because this makes crops less pest-resistant, drought resistant, etc. As a result of my eating this crop, I'll get a greater diversity of nutrients, as well. Earth wins, body wins, Monsanto loses. I'm okay with this.
Lowering my house temp (and programming my thermostat).
- We used to keep the house at a steady 69 degrees (when I was first a stay at home mom; I worried about Tessa being cold). I've read that we can cut our heating bill by 3-5% per degree lowered (in the winter; we don't have air conditioning so that's not an issue for us). Well, now we're keeping the house at a high of 66 degrees, and lowering it to 60-62 degrees at night and while we're gone. If costs equates to energy use, then just by putting on a sweater (if you come over and you're cold I'll loan you one!) we're lowering our energy use by something like 15%.
- It's not weird to wear a sweater. It's NORMAL. It's healthy. There is no down side.
Walking, biking, bussing....not driving.
- We live in a great walking community. How often do I go to the Junction? And how often have I DRIVEN to the Junction? That's crazy! We're less than a mile away from grocery stores, Farmer's Market, specialty shops, resturants, coffee shops, art gallery, live theater. A great percentage of the miles I drive are within West Seattle. Well, why not walk? My body loves it. My brain gets endorphins (there's that happy thing again). The environment loves it. It takes a little longer, but even that can be a good thing. I am so tired of rushing! I love those walks with Tessa....we talk, we notice things, we feel the seasonal changes.
- I don't need to tell anyone who knows us that Ryan is a bike fanatic. He's HAPPY when he's on his bike. He's gleeful when he bikes to work....passing all the stopped cars. Good for body, good for soul, good for environment.
- It's not possible to walk or bike everywhere. So I'm adding the bus to my list. We take it downtown whenever possible (so much easier than traffic and parking issues) but I'm trying to use it even more than that. Yesterday, we walked a few blocks from the Amtrak station to a bus stop....and Ryan discovered a beautiful park downtown with a waterfall. We caught the bus, and ran into some friends. I was scrambling to find a quarter (bus fare is $1.50 and I had $1.25 and a $20 bill) and a nice lady gave me a quarter with instructions to "pay it forward" next time I was on the bus.
- I found out that the bus by our house goes to the Target/Westwood Village area. So next time I need to go to the library, Marshall's, or even (sigh) Target, I could bus it. I'm committed to taking the bus even within West Seattle when possible.
Stop buying "stuff."
- When I look around my house, I don't see needs. We have furniture, blankets, clothing. We have decorative stuff (candlesticks, pictures, etc.) We have entertainment (games, television, stereo, even Xbox). Our cupboards and closets and attic are overflowing with things. We "need" very, very little.
- The pursuit of stuff makes me temporarily happy....but then I usually feel bad. The items are often not quite right. I spend too much time in pursuit of these items (shopping) and not enough time in parks, at SAM or the zoo or the aquarium or the beach. Then I spend a ton of time organizing my stuff, cleaning my stuff, getting rid of my stuff (come see us at C&P May 10 for the yard sale!). In short, stuff doesn't make me happy.
- All that stuff produces insane quantities of waste. For every one can of garbage at the household level, 70 cans of "garbage" (including toxins in the air and water) are produced earlier in the production cycle. See http://www.storyofstuff.com/ if you haven't already. I don't want to add to that kind of waste!
- The production of stuff requires huge amounts of petroleum/oil, and that's awful for the environment and my body.
- I shouldn't need to say it, but I will: stuff costs money. Money I could be using to live within my means. Living within my means = feeling happier.
I'm rambling (in the time I've written this email, I've also prepared snacks for girls, done chores, gotten the dog out of mischief, etc.) but I think you're getting the point.
The bottom line? I'm the crazy lady. And I'm okay with that. It's going to get crazier, too. And that makes me happy.
If you're reading this for ideas, and you're not prepared to tear up your lawn to plant a vegetable garden, or you're not ready to retire your car keys, try these simple things instead:
- Replace conventional lightbulbs with energy efficient ones. Major positive impact on the environment, and they're said to last up to 30 times longer.
- Choose something that you eat that's not currently organic, and replace it with organic food. Maybe apples - start small like that.
- Next time you have a small errand, consider walking. Choose a nice day - and walk to the mailbox, the coffee shop, the corner store. Leave your car at home. Enjoy the weather, the flowers, the conversation along the way.
- Find a bag (you've already got one....maybe a lightweight beach bag, maybe a giant purse, maybe a canvas tote, maybe a backpack, or maybe one that they sell at the grocery store) and take it with you whenever you shop. The grocery store, but also any other errands you're doing. Keep those bags out of landfills! This isn't newfangled, this is old school. In Europe, this is what they've been doing "forever."
- Plant something edible in a pot, and grow it organically. Maybe just basil for your kitchen, or maybe a few strawberries, or maybe a tomato plant. Harvest from your small crop, and enjoy the satisfaction of knowing you've done this.
While I was gone, I finished reading the David Wann book, and then I came home to a gift in the mail from Carolyn - a new book called, "Farewell, My Subaru" about a guy who decides to move to New Mexico and attempt to live an off-the-grid-petroleum-free lifestyle. (The title is because he has a beloved Subaru with 200,000 miles on it, but he decides to switch over to a giant truck....that runs on bio-diesel, aka vegetable grease, that he gets from fast food resturants.)
All of this reading has me more convinced than ever that I am okay with being "that nut" - the crazy lady who jumps societal ship to do things in new ways. I am more and more convinced that this is less "weird" and more "cutting edge" and that I am finding the wave of the future. My rationale?
- Our planet can not sustain the level of resource use and abuse that it currently takes. We're running out of petroleum (and sometimes paying $4/gallon for gas - ACK!), our water and air are polluted, our biodiversity is in jeopardy, and the things we take for granted are proving themselves to be in short supply.
- Our bodies can not sustain this level of abuse. Our bodies need clean air and water, for instance. And healthy food with vitamins built into it. Don't believe me? Look at cancer rates on the rise. Look at diabetes rates. Look at the rate of heart disease. You might be able to get away with it, and your body might keep you going....but for how long? And what will it take for us to stand up and notice that our bodies are crying out for help?
- We're not happy. Something is inherently wrong in a system where people feel disconnected from community, friends and family. We buy and buy and buy because "they" (marketing, corporations, and even governmental advertising that says "go out and boost the economy!") say it will make us happy. Well, national happiness levels are lower than ever. People are buying, but they're getting stuff, not happiness. Doesn't this tell us something?
- I'm starting to really "get" that we can live much better on our salary than we have been living. We can have all that we need - and more - and have money left over. We can eat well (organic, healthy food) and spend less. Money issues are stressful, and so my happiness increases when I reduce this stress. Much of our spending is bad for the environment (how do they manufacture that plastic stuff, anyway?), so less spending on "stuff" equals better environment, too.
Environment, bodies, happiness, money. All tied together...wow.
So here's what I want. I want to be happy. I want to breathe clean air, to drink clean water. I want to be healthy. I want to live within our means. That's it. The reason for my craziness is that I want these simple things.
Here's what I'm doing right now to get to where I'm going:
Plant a vegetable (and fruit!) garden. Such a simple thing, but it's giving me a lot:
- time outdoors to breathe fresh air and work my body
- fresh food that is as healthy as anything on the planet
- reduced carbon emissions - did you know that the average piece of food travels 2000 miles to get to your table? Well, my garden will travel about 20-40 feet to get to my table. By foot, not by gas powered vehicle, so not producing crap for the environment to deal with and for my body to deal with.
- a sense of well being. I'm not a gardener (au contraire), but I'm realizing that there is something meditative about working the soil, about doing this project as a family. I know what I'm doing and why. Simply put, it's satisfying. Amazing. All this satisfaction from seeds?!
- Improved biodiversity. I'm not buying seeds from Monsanto, I'm buying heirloom vegetables. Why? Because the biodiversity of crops is falling annually, and because this makes crops less pest-resistant, drought resistant, etc. As a result of my eating this crop, I'll get a greater diversity of nutrients, as well. Earth wins, body wins, Monsanto loses. I'm okay with this.
Lowering my house temp (and programming my thermostat).
- We used to keep the house at a steady 69 degrees (when I was first a stay at home mom; I worried about Tessa being cold). I've read that we can cut our heating bill by 3-5% per degree lowered (in the winter; we don't have air conditioning so that's not an issue for us). Well, now we're keeping the house at a high of 66 degrees, and lowering it to 60-62 degrees at night and while we're gone. If costs equates to energy use, then just by putting on a sweater (if you come over and you're cold I'll loan you one!) we're lowering our energy use by something like 15%.
- It's not weird to wear a sweater. It's NORMAL. It's healthy. There is no down side.
Walking, biking, bussing....not driving.
- We live in a great walking community. How often do I go to the Junction? And how often have I DRIVEN to the Junction? That's crazy! We're less than a mile away from grocery stores, Farmer's Market, specialty shops, resturants, coffee shops, art gallery, live theater. A great percentage of the miles I drive are within West Seattle. Well, why not walk? My body loves it. My brain gets endorphins (there's that happy thing again). The environment loves it. It takes a little longer, but even that can be a good thing. I am so tired of rushing! I love those walks with Tessa....we talk, we notice things, we feel the seasonal changes.
- I don't need to tell anyone who knows us that Ryan is a bike fanatic. He's HAPPY when he's on his bike. He's gleeful when he bikes to work....passing all the stopped cars. Good for body, good for soul, good for environment.
- It's not possible to walk or bike everywhere. So I'm adding the bus to my list. We take it downtown whenever possible (so much easier than traffic and parking issues) but I'm trying to use it even more than that. Yesterday, we walked a few blocks from the Amtrak station to a bus stop....and Ryan discovered a beautiful park downtown with a waterfall. We caught the bus, and ran into some friends. I was scrambling to find a quarter (bus fare is $1.50 and I had $1.25 and a $20 bill) and a nice lady gave me a quarter with instructions to "pay it forward" next time I was on the bus.
- I found out that the bus by our house goes to the Target/Westwood Village area. So next time I need to go to the library, Marshall's, or even (sigh) Target, I could bus it. I'm committed to taking the bus even within West Seattle when possible.
Stop buying "stuff."
- When I look around my house, I don't see needs. We have furniture, blankets, clothing. We have decorative stuff (candlesticks, pictures, etc.) We have entertainment (games, television, stereo, even Xbox). Our cupboards and closets and attic are overflowing with things. We "need" very, very little.
- The pursuit of stuff makes me temporarily happy....but then I usually feel bad. The items are often not quite right. I spend too much time in pursuit of these items (shopping) and not enough time in parks, at SAM or the zoo or the aquarium or the beach. Then I spend a ton of time organizing my stuff, cleaning my stuff, getting rid of my stuff (come see us at C&P May 10 for the yard sale!). In short, stuff doesn't make me happy.
- All that stuff produces insane quantities of waste. For every one can of garbage at the household level, 70 cans of "garbage" (including toxins in the air and water) are produced earlier in the production cycle. See http://www.storyofstuff.com/ if you haven't already. I don't want to add to that kind of waste!
- The production of stuff requires huge amounts of petroleum/oil, and that's awful for the environment and my body.
- I shouldn't need to say it, but I will: stuff costs money. Money I could be using to live within my means. Living within my means = feeling happier.
I'm rambling (in the time I've written this email, I've also prepared snacks for girls, done chores, gotten the dog out of mischief, etc.) but I think you're getting the point.
The bottom line? I'm the crazy lady. And I'm okay with that. It's going to get crazier, too. And that makes me happy.
If you're reading this for ideas, and you're not prepared to tear up your lawn to plant a vegetable garden, or you're not ready to retire your car keys, try these simple things instead:
- Replace conventional lightbulbs with energy efficient ones. Major positive impact on the environment, and they're said to last up to 30 times longer.
- Choose something that you eat that's not currently organic, and replace it with organic food. Maybe apples - start small like that.
- Next time you have a small errand, consider walking. Choose a nice day - and walk to the mailbox, the coffee shop, the corner store. Leave your car at home. Enjoy the weather, the flowers, the conversation along the way.
- Find a bag (you've already got one....maybe a lightweight beach bag, maybe a giant purse, maybe a canvas tote, maybe a backpack, or maybe one that they sell at the grocery store) and take it with you whenever you shop. The grocery store, but also any other errands you're doing. Keep those bags out of landfills! This isn't newfangled, this is old school. In Europe, this is what they've been doing "forever."
- Plant something edible in a pot, and grow it organically. Maybe just basil for your kitchen, or maybe a few strawberries, or maybe a tomato plant. Harvest from your small crop, and enjoy the satisfaction of knowing you've done this.
Sunday, April 20, 2008
Faking it pays off!
I was so frustrated when Dr. Isik told me that I shouldn't be tired any more. I thought "What am I doing wrong?!" I certainly wasn't faking my fatigue - it was awful.
So I thought about it, and decided that it was no way to live, and decided to fake it. No more letting life pass my by while I layed around feeling sorry for myself.
Yesterday, I did a project that has been driving me crazy: I organized the attic, reviewing what we have for a yard sale (not as much as I thought - hmmmm). I took Tessa to a birthday party, and while she played princess I looked through Cooking Light and came up with a week's worth of recipes and a meal plan for the week; then we went to Trader Joe's and bought what we needed (the goal, once again, to eat everything from our fridge this week). Last night, Lori came over, and we chatted and stayed up later than I'm used to and watched a movie. Today, after a very leisurely morning (I decided that I couldn't remember the last time I just hung out drinking coffee, so despite some remorse, we stayed home from church; Ryan also did a long bike ride) we did yard work as a family, and I did lots of weeding, a bit of mulching, and some planting (leeks, kale, lettuce, marigolds, cabbage, and strawberries) and Ryan cleaned up the area for the blueberries, further working the soil, pulling up grass in that area, and mulching over the soaker hose (the blueberries are looking well!). I posted the old play structure on Craigslist and got a taker right away, and Ryan and the gentleman are currently taking it apart to fit in the gentleman's truck.
The result? I feel tired, certainly, but better than I have in a long time...better than since my surgery. Our yard has progress for the first time in a while, my body feels tired and sore but from activity (which is much better than feeling tired and sore from inactivity).
And this allows me to think about more than just "oh poor me" which has been my focus far too much lately.
Back to gardening, which is part of caring for the earth, using my body in a physical way that is healthy, teaching Tessa about the connection of food to the earth, and being frugal. (Our neighbors Sarah & Steven gave us soaker hoses, and then Kathleen gave us one, too.....hurrah!)
And posting the play structure on Craigslist has been a goal of mine for some time, and the $100 will help our coffers immensely. Frugal, recycling.....check!
So I'm trying to get back in the swing of things. I'm trying to care for the earth, care for my family, care for our budget, avoid consumerism (including the "let's order pizza because I'm too tired to cook" nights), and soak up the sun. It helps that there WAS sun today, by the way.
Let's hope that the rest of the week is like this, too. I still have the paint and supplies to finish painting the downstairs bathroom....wouldn't that be a good project to finish? And I continue to shop Craigslist to find a new entertainment center and loveseat for downstairs (free would be good for that, by the way).
I'm filled with enthusiasm to get back on board with these things. I want to help out friends, I want to organize playdates, I want to go for long walks with Shep.
Let's hope my body feels okay tomorrow. But today, so far, so good.
So I thought about it, and decided that it was no way to live, and decided to fake it. No more letting life pass my by while I layed around feeling sorry for myself.
Yesterday, I did a project that has been driving me crazy: I organized the attic, reviewing what we have for a yard sale (not as much as I thought - hmmmm). I took Tessa to a birthday party, and while she played princess I looked through Cooking Light and came up with a week's worth of recipes and a meal plan for the week; then we went to Trader Joe's and bought what we needed (the goal, once again, to eat everything from our fridge this week). Last night, Lori came over, and we chatted and stayed up later than I'm used to and watched a movie. Today, after a very leisurely morning (I decided that I couldn't remember the last time I just hung out drinking coffee, so despite some remorse, we stayed home from church; Ryan also did a long bike ride) we did yard work as a family, and I did lots of weeding, a bit of mulching, and some planting (leeks, kale, lettuce, marigolds, cabbage, and strawberries) and Ryan cleaned up the area for the blueberries, further working the soil, pulling up grass in that area, and mulching over the soaker hose (the blueberries are looking well!). I posted the old play structure on Craigslist and got a taker right away, and Ryan and the gentleman are currently taking it apart to fit in the gentleman's truck.
The result? I feel tired, certainly, but better than I have in a long time...better than since my surgery. Our yard has progress for the first time in a while, my body feels tired and sore but from activity (which is much better than feeling tired and sore from inactivity).
And this allows me to think about more than just "oh poor me" which has been my focus far too much lately.
Back to gardening, which is part of caring for the earth, using my body in a physical way that is healthy, teaching Tessa about the connection of food to the earth, and being frugal. (Our neighbors Sarah & Steven gave us soaker hoses, and then Kathleen gave us one, too.....hurrah!)
And posting the play structure on Craigslist has been a goal of mine for some time, and the $100 will help our coffers immensely. Frugal, recycling.....check!
So I'm trying to get back in the swing of things. I'm trying to care for the earth, care for my family, care for our budget, avoid consumerism (including the "let's order pizza because I'm too tired to cook" nights), and soak up the sun. It helps that there WAS sun today, by the way.
Let's hope that the rest of the week is like this, too. I still have the paint and supplies to finish painting the downstairs bathroom....wouldn't that be a good project to finish? And I continue to shop Craigslist to find a new entertainment center and loveseat for downstairs (free would be good for that, by the way).
I'm filled with enthusiasm to get back on board with these things. I want to help out friends, I want to organize playdates, I want to go for long walks with Shep.
Let's hope my body feels okay tomorrow. But today, so far, so good.
Friday, April 18, 2008
Update from the PS
Today I visited Dr. Isik.
He said I'm healing beautifully. He said that my implant is not moving; the bottom of the implant is remaining in place, but there is a seratoma (code name for "excess fluid" which is harmless and will be reabsorbed by my body) at the top of my left (treated) breast which is making it appear misshapen, but is not a long term problem.
I just need to be patient. Oh, how I hate being patient.
I am allowed to swim with Tessa (no more concern about infection). I am allowed to walk, use an elliptical without my arms, or sit on a stationary bike. No jiggling, no jumping, no jogging. No lifting any kind of weights. I am now allowed to lift my arms past my shoulders, and expected to get physical therapy again to regain range of motion (helllllo, Adrienne....).
Three more weeks, and I can jog.
But the fatigue? No answers. I shouldn't be feeling it like I am. I'm wayyyy behind schedule. I should have felt better a week ago.
Sigh.
Finally, it all catches up with me.
Of course, I can't help but wonder "is it mets?" because that would be just par for the course. (Bad attitude. I know. I can't help it. And you'd wonder too, if it was you.) I try to suppress these thoughts, but they rise. Maybe it's all falling apart.
Or maybe I'm just tired. It's all so wearing.
The next surgery is supposed to be about half the healing time of this one, although still six weeks with no exercise or jiggling.
Tonight Tessa is going bowling with Ryan, Anna, and Artie. I will curl up in bed. I look forward to the day when I can stay home because I'm DOING something and not because I can't get out of bed...
He said I'm healing beautifully. He said that my implant is not moving; the bottom of the implant is remaining in place, but there is a seratoma (code name for "excess fluid" which is harmless and will be reabsorbed by my body) at the top of my left (treated) breast which is making it appear misshapen, but is not a long term problem.
I just need to be patient. Oh, how I hate being patient.
I am allowed to swim with Tessa (no more concern about infection). I am allowed to walk, use an elliptical without my arms, or sit on a stationary bike. No jiggling, no jumping, no jogging. No lifting any kind of weights. I am now allowed to lift my arms past my shoulders, and expected to get physical therapy again to regain range of motion (helllllo, Adrienne....).
Three more weeks, and I can jog.
But the fatigue? No answers. I shouldn't be feeling it like I am. I'm wayyyy behind schedule. I should have felt better a week ago.
Sigh.
Finally, it all catches up with me.
Of course, I can't help but wonder "is it mets?" because that would be just par for the course. (Bad attitude. I know. I can't help it. And you'd wonder too, if it was you.) I try to suppress these thoughts, but they rise. Maybe it's all falling apart.
Or maybe I'm just tired. It's all so wearing.
The next surgery is supposed to be about half the healing time of this one, although still six weeks with no exercise or jiggling.
Tonight Tessa is going bowling with Ryan, Anna, and Artie. I will curl up in bed. I look forward to the day when I can stay home because I'm DOING something and not because I can't get out of bed...
Thursday, April 17, 2008
Naps
Tonight we're seeing Paul & Libby in Edmonds. I haven't seen them in a long time....but I'm worried about making it through until 8pm when we must be home for Tessa's bedtime.
I went to Tessa's field trip, although I didn't have to drive as I carpooled with Katie, and Katie saw me drooping. She has Tessa and sent me home to take a nap. Thanks, Katie....I need it even though I protest.
This fatigue thing is out of hand.
I went to Tessa's field trip, although I didn't have to drive as I carpooled with Katie, and Katie saw me drooping. She has Tessa and sent me home to take a nap. Thanks, Katie....I need it even though I protest.
This fatigue thing is out of hand.
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
I did it
Tonight I sent Ryan away for a little alone-time, a little time to take care of himself without worrying about TK and I. With Jenny's help - she made us a fabulous dinner - and the fact that Tessa, Zoe, and Liam played beautifully together, I made it through. Tessa is tucked in to bed, and I'm about to follow.
I'm exhausted. For a bit I thought I wouldn't make it. But I did.
Good night!
I'm exhausted. For a bit I thought I wouldn't make it. But I did.
Good night!
Thursday, April 10, 2008
A good start to the day
I woke up today with a headache, as I have every day since surgery, but today I woke up with something else, too....a sense of calm. WOW. I can't tell you how I've missed that.
Today I feel more filled with hope, and the possibilities for joy, than in a long while. How does one describe such feelings? It's not a bouncy, energetic feeling....it's quieter. It's peaceful. And I'll take it!
Today I feel more filled with hope, and the possibilities for joy, than in a long while. How does one describe such feelings? It's not a bouncy, energetic feeling....it's quieter. It's peaceful. And I'll take it!
Tuesday, April 08, 2008
One foot in front of the other
Yesterday I made it in mothering-land until about 3:45pm. Today I hope to make it until at least 5, and maybe beyond. Beth has Tessa for a couple of hours this morning (playdate with Anna - the girls love each other), and then it's preschool for Tessa while I go visit my lovely shrink. I'm actually a bit nervous about driving so far - my body is so tired and driving involves shoulder checks and sitting in one position and such but I know I can do it, we'll just see how tired it makes me.
And since when does a 20 minute drive exhaust me? Argh.
I realized a couple of things yesterday:
1) The sensations I've been feeling (nausea, fatigue, headaches, digestive issues, etc) are most similar to chemo. Yuck. There are some memories I don't want to relive.
2) The drugs were too much for me. I actually do not remember anything from the day of surgery - I took an Ativan before going in - until about Friday? Saturday? - which is really scary. I read my own blog and I'm thinking "hmmm I guess I remember that" but it's really, really fuzzy. Wow. I have little snippets of memory, but I can't link the days together. It's frightening. I think I'd rather have the pain than that. Or would I? It's sort of confusing.
I'm taking it slow. One foot in front of the other. Minor house chores (made Tessa's breakfast - our new favorite of oatmeal mixed with berries, non-fat-plain-yogurt, and maple syrup; laundry; unloading dishwasher...I'm not too ambitious), going for a short walk with Shep after this (I think it will be good for both of us), going to the good doc, having another quiet evening at home.
It's only been a week (less!) and I barely remember what it feels like to be normal. My head is so fuzzy from this experience. But each day is better than the one before it so I'm trying to remember that this, too, shall pass.
And since when does a 20 minute drive exhaust me? Argh.
I realized a couple of things yesterday:
1) The sensations I've been feeling (nausea, fatigue, headaches, digestive issues, etc) are most similar to chemo. Yuck. There are some memories I don't want to relive.
2) The drugs were too much for me. I actually do not remember anything from the day of surgery - I took an Ativan before going in - until about Friday? Saturday? - which is really scary. I read my own blog and I'm thinking "hmmm I guess I remember that" but it's really, really fuzzy. Wow. I have little snippets of memory, but I can't link the days together. It's frightening. I think I'd rather have the pain than that. Or would I? It's sort of confusing.
I'm taking it slow. One foot in front of the other. Minor house chores (made Tessa's breakfast - our new favorite of oatmeal mixed with berries, non-fat-plain-yogurt, and maple syrup; laundry; unloading dishwasher...I'm not too ambitious), going for a short walk with Shep after this (I think it will be good for both of us), going to the good doc, having another quiet evening at home.
It's only been a week (less!) and I barely remember what it feels like to be normal. My head is so fuzzy from this experience. But each day is better than the one before it so I'm trying to remember that this, too, shall pass.
Thursday, April 03, 2008
Sunday, March 30, 2008
A new day
The traditional day of rest.
This morning Tessa is snuffly with allergies and Ryan awoke with a migraine. Tessa's slow to get up but will be fine; Ryan took Immitrex and hopefully he'll be fine in an hour or two. I'm still reeling from the news of Cathy but I am prepared to make it a new day.
We also got excellent news yesterday. Tessa will be attending Alki Elementary School next year - our first choice! The letters went out early, as I didn't expect to hear for a week or two. She's delighted by this, as she had it in her head that it was where she wanted to go, because "big kids" Emma and Liam go there, and because her friends Jessie & Zoe will go there (when Zoe returns from Panama, anyway).
Now, off to rouse Tessa. I really, really want to attend church this morning - my soul needs a little rest.
Love,
Kristina
This morning Tessa is snuffly with allergies and Ryan awoke with a migraine. Tessa's slow to get up but will be fine; Ryan took Immitrex and hopefully he'll be fine in an hour or two. I'm still reeling from the news of Cathy but I am prepared to make it a new day.
We also got excellent news yesterday. Tessa will be attending Alki Elementary School next year - our first choice! The letters went out early, as I didn't expect to hear for a week or two. She's delighted by this, as she had it in her head that it was where she wanted to go, because "big kids" Emma and Liam go there, and because her friends Jessie & Zoe will go there (when Zoe returns from Panama, anyway).
Now, off to rouse Tessa. I really, really want to attend church this morning - my soul needs a little rest.
Love,
Kristina
Wednesday, March 19, 2008
Phew
I'm glad today is over.
Tessa threw up repeatedly from the force of her cough. I hate throw up under general principles, but my heart ached for her on top of my general disgust. (Poor kid!) She's doing okay tonight but it was a rough day.
And, to prove that I'm certifiably crazy, I did a painting project half the day. The hallway between upstairs/downstairs (the stairwell, really) was dingy and gross and impossible to clean - I'll bet it hadn't been painted in 20 years, and it was the last part of our house to be painted since we moved in (except the downstairs bathroom, which has newish but gross paint). Anyway, after my satisfaction from the light fixture project, I thought "okay this has been bugging me for years - let's just take care of it!" so I did. We had paint leftover from painting the kitchen, and since that hallway is visible from the kitchen I thought it made sense to continue with it. (It's also a satin finish, great for wiping handprints...important due to its location.) We also had trimwork paint left over, and so I did that, too (though the trim had been painted monochromatic before).
And then I touched up Tessa's bathroom stepstool, too.
I'm exhausted. It was a hard day, physically, and my mental state of being is still questionable. (Ha!)
Still, I'm glad I did it. It's an improvement to our home, and it was free. It's good to see tangible results.
And now I'm going to bed. I'm wiped.
Tessa threw up repeatedly from the force of her cough. I hate throw up under general principles, but my heart ached for her on top of my general disgust. (Poor kid!) She's doing okay tonight but it was a rough day.
And, to prove that I'm certifiably crazy, I did a painting project half the day. The hallway between upstairs/downstairs (the stairwell, really) was dingy and gross and impossible to clean - I'll bet it hadn't been painted in 20 years, and it was the last part of our house to be painted since we moved in (except the downstairs bathroom, which has newish but gross paint). Anyway, after my satisfaction from the light fixture project, I thought "okay this has been bugging me for years - let's just take care of it!" so I did. We had paint leftover from painting the kitchen, and since that hallway is visible from the kitchen I thought it made sense to continue with it. (It's also a satin finish, great for wiping handprints...important due to its location.) We also had trimwork paint left over, and so I did that, too (though the trim had been painted monochromatic before).
And then I touched up Tessa's bathroom stepstool, too.
I'm exhausted. It was a hard day, physically, and my mental state of being is still questionable. (Ha!)
Still, I'm glad I did it. It's an improvement to our home, and it was free. It's good to see tangible results.
And now I'm going to bed. I'm wiped.
Monday, March 17, 2008
Monday
"Tell me why I don't like Mondays..."
Tessa is still sleeping. It is 11am. She is sick. I will call the doctor when she wakes up.
She says the back of her neck hurts, as well as the back of her knee. I'm imagining the worst possible scenerios. I feel frozen with fear when I think of her being "really" sick and can't even write what I think that might be.
It's probably nothing. Just one of those kid things. Right?
We're supposed to be at Zoe's birthday in a half hour. Zoe is at the doctor with her brother right now, who is also sick.
I got a lovely call from Carolyn this morning. I love you, Carolyn....
Tonight is my KOMO interview. I hope I'm up to this - put on my inspirational face....
Tessa is still sleeping. It is 11am. She is sick. I will call the doctor when she wakes up.
She says the back of her neck hurts, as well as the back of her knee. I'm imagining the worst possible scenerios. I feel frozen with fear when I think of her being "really" sick and can't even write what I think that might be.
It's probably nothing. Just one of those kid things. Right?
We're supposed to be at Zoe's birthday in a half hour. Zoe is at the doctor with her brother right now, who is also sick.
I got a lovely call from Carolyn this morning. I love you, Carolyn....
Tonight is my KOMO interview. I hope I'm up to this - put on my inspirational face....
Saturday, March 15, 2008
Bad Juju
What the heck is going on at our house? Really, I feel way past my limits.
I have felt lousy for a couple of weeks. My throat is still sore, I'm still phlegmy, etc.
Tessa has had a cough for two weeks. Yesterday she had a great time at preschool and her teachers said she was doing fine, but in the evening she fell asleep while Zoe was over and didn't even want dessert - home made cobbler with Husky Deli vanilla ice cream. (This is NOT normal.) Last night she woke up in the middle of the night and said, "My head hurts" and "my bones ache" for several hours.
This was not the rest I required after my miserable day yesterday. Ryan and I took shifts, but it was a loooooong night.
This morning, we've canceled our plans (my parents were going to care for Tessa tonight while Ryan and I went to a discussion/dinner at 'Chele & Dave's; the whole family was going to go to Caleb's egg hunt) and we're settling in for a quiet day. Ryan prepared 'a nest' for Tessa on the courch downstairs, and carried her downstairs to rest in front of the TV, propped up with pillows and blankets and coziness. But Ryan missed the bottom step (or two), and landed on his bad ankle, and found himself lying on the floor in agony. (Tessa was fine, he didn't drop her.) He's icing his ankle now and took two ibuprofen.
What the ****? ENOUGH! C'mon! What's next, locusts and floods? I'm TIRED! I need a break!!!!!!! I have enough on my plate. Enough, I tell you! This is getting ridiculous!
Vent over. Thanks for listening.
I read the affirmation from Daily Word today, and it was lovely. We had a family snuggle in bed this morning. Ryan brought me coffee in bed (before his ankle incident). Tessa is content to watch old Clifford episodes and snuggle her stuffed animals on the couch. I know it could be worse. I know, I know, I know. Lots to be grateful for.
But still.....
I have felt lousy for a couple of weeks. My throat is still sore, I'm still phlegmy, etc.
Tessa has had a cough for two weeks. Yesterday she had a great time at preschool and her teachers said she was doing fine, but in the evening she fell asleep while Zoe was over and didn't even want dessert - home made cobbler with Husky Deli vanilla ice cream. (This is NOT normal.) Last night she woke up in the middle of the night and said, "My head hurts" and "my bones ache" for several hours.
This was not the rest I required after my miserable day yesterday. Ryan and I took shifts, but it was a loooooong night.
This morning, we've canceled our plans (my parents were going to care for Tessa tonight while Ryan and I went to a discussion/dinner at 'Chele & Dave's; the whole family was going to go to Caleb's egg hunt) and we're settling in for a quiet day. Ryan prepared 'a nest' for Tessa on the courch downstairs, and carried her downstairs to rest in front of the TV, propped up with pillows and blankets and coziness. But Ryan missed the bottom step (or two), and landed on his bad ankle, and found himself lying on the floor in agony. (Tessa was fine, he didn't drop her.) He's icing his ankle now and took two ibuprofen.
What the ****? ENOUGH! C'mon! What's next, locusts and floods? I'm TIRED! I need a break!!!!!!! I have enough on my plate. Enough, I tell you! This is getting ridiculous!
Vent over. Thanks for listening.
I read the affirmation from Daily Word today, and it was lovely. We had a family snuggle in bed this morning. Ryan brought me coffee in bed (before his ankle incident). Tessa is content to watch old Clifford episodes and snuggle her stuffed animals on the couch. I know it could be worse. I know, I know, I know. Lots to be grateful for.
But still.....
Thursday, March 06, 2008
Bedtime
Tonight i went back and forth about attending bookclub - should I or shouldn't I? I love going, but I feel so crummy.
Well, given that it is 7:39 and I can't stay up a minute more, I know the answer. Good night, all. Tomorrow is a new day. It will be better.
(But my bathrooms are clean, Ryan vacuumed, the laundry got put away, dusting got done - with Tessa's help - and the Costco errand got run, and all is well.)
Well, given that it is 7:39 and I can't stay up a minute more, I know the answer. Good night, all. Tomorrow is a new day. It will be better.
(But my bathrooms are clean, Ryan vacuumed, the laundry got put away, dusting got done - with Tessa's help - and the Costco errand got run, and all is well.)
Ack
Last night my throat felt a little scratchy, and Ryan commented that my voice was a little scratchy, but I didn't make anything of it. Today I've lost my voice - arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Gimme a break!
I'm sure it will be short lived. I have visitors coming tomorrow and I fully plan to continue with that plan!
I'm sure it will be short lived. I have visitors coming tomorrow and I fully plan to continue with that plan!
Saturday, March 01, 2008
March weekend
Today Ryan woke up with a migraine - uh oh. He took his Immitrex (sp?) and is in the darkened guest room right now, trying to sleep it off. Hopefully within two hours he'll feel much better.
The plan for this weekend is to spend a little time today at C&P (about to leave!), to run an errand at WaMu (Tessa and I are going to go - she's going to ride her bike, and I'm going to walk beside her with Shep...wish me luck! It's about a mile and a half round trip and I'll have my hands full.), and then it's gardening, gardening, gardening.
We're going to break ground on the new garden, and go up to West Seattle Nursury to buy extra compost (we don't have enough) and fertilizer, to prep the soil for planting. It's going to be back breaking work, but I swear it will be worth it. We also have a truckload's worth of mulch (free!) that we need to spread on our other beds. It will be a busy day, and at the end of it all we'll be tired, but hopefully in that satisfying way. We'll have a quiet family night together, and I even envision board games. We'll see!
Sunday, we'll go to church (the subject is happiness, and references the Dalai Lama's thoughts on happiness, and I'm particularly intrigued and hopeful that I'll walk away with something interesting) and our friend Bryona is coming (Graham too, I hope). Then, the Farmer's Market....and then we have no plans. I like the no plans part as much as the other parts.
And now, off to the day. Fingers crossed that Ryan's meds work and the migraine disappears quickly!
The plan for this weekend is to spend a little time today at C&P (about to leave!), to run an errand at WaMu (Tessa and I are going to go - she's going to ride her bike, and I'm going to walk beside her with Shep...wish me luck! It's about a mile and a half round trip and I'll have my hands full.), and then it's gardening, gardening, gardening.
We're going to break ground on the new garden, and go up to West Seattle Nursury to buy extra compost (we don't have enough) and fertilizer, to prep the soil for planting. It's going to be back breaking work, but I swear it will be worth it. We also have a truckload's worth of mulch (free!) that we need to spread on our other beds. It will be a busy day, and at the end of it all we'll be tired, but hopefully in that satisfying way. We'll have a quiet family night together, and I even envision board games. We'll see!
Sunday, we'll go to church (the subject is happiness, and references the Dalai Lama's thoughts on happiness, and I'm particularly intrigued and hopeful that I'll walk away with something interesting) and our friend Bryona is coming (Graham too, I hope). Then, the Farmer's Market....and then we have no plans. I like the no plans part as much as the other parts.
And now, off to the day. Fingers crossed that Ryan's meds work and the migraine disappears quickly!
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
Yoga
I love yoga. I've been doing some slow yoga classes lately: they're not cardio, but they are fabulous stretches and they make me feel so great. Lori and I went to one on Sunday, and Sarah and I went tonight. The Y offers these classes free to members, and it's close enough to walk (especially in this great weather). Tonight, in honor of the lunar eclipse (which was beautiful), we did a lot of moon salutes; I'd never done those before (though I've done countless sun salutes) but they were great and made me feel like I was in touch with the earth. Ancient rituals...
Today I visited with my mom, and she's doing great. I'm proud of her hard work at healing, and her great attitude about it. Nothing about it is easy - bedrest stinks, to put it mildly - but she's holding up well, and starting to be more active.
I went to the library today and picked up a book about organic vegetable gardening, in addition to some other books. I'm getting serious about growing some of our food, so we'll see how this goes. I have a LOT to learn.
I'm too tired for more; it's past my bedtime. Goodnight.
Today I visited with my mom, and she's doing great. I'm proud of her hard work at healing, and her great attitude about it. Nothing about it is easy - bedrest stinks, to put it mildly - but she's holding up well, and starting to be more active.
I went to the library today and picked up a book about organic vegetable gardening, in addition to some other books. I'm getting serious about growing some of our food, so we'll see how this goes. I have a LOT to learn.
I'm too tired for more; it's past my bedtime. Goodnight.
Saturday, February 16, 2008
Grrr
Bumps in the road.
Ryan isn't well this morning; he's raspy and congested and feels lousy. My throat is sore, but he's obviously the worse off right now.
And the darn bread didn't work. It did the kneading and the rising, but not the baking. Ack! I'm rebaking the same loaf on a different setting in the bread machine right now to see if it will work; the end result won't be good after sitting out all night but I want to make sure the machine is going to work before wasting more ingredients. Plus, I'm out of honey.
Ryan isn't well this morning; he's raspy and congested and feels lousy. My throat is sore, but he's obviously the worse off right now.
And the darn bread didn't work. It did the kneading and the rising, but not the baking. Ack! I'm rebaking the same loaf on a different setting in the bread machine right now to see if it will work; the end result won't be good after sitting out all night but I want to make sure the machine is going to work before wasting more ingredients. Plus, I'm out of honey.
Monday, February 11, 2008
looking up
Okay, my nausea has subsided, and Tessa's mood is excellent. I've just tucked her into bed, and she appears full of energy this evening. She ate regularly (thank you so much, Michele, for the delicious posole), and she's ready for preschool tomorrow.
I hope to sleep well - alone, no child! - tonight and wake up feeling refreshed...
I hope to sleep well - alone, no child! - tonight and wake up feeling refreshed...
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