Today, on two seperate occassions, women approached me and said, "Are you in chemo for breast cancer?" and then shared that they are survivors; coincidentally, each of them is five years out. The both took my hand, looked into my eyes, and said, "You can do this." Truly, it was inspiring - they were both vibrant, smiling women with full heads of hair, and it was incredible to feel their strength and to watch the sparkle in their eyes as they shared their victory with me. I am so grateful to these strangers for sharing their hope with me - thank you, whoever you are, ladies!
I have more serious concerns about lymphedema today. I can no longer see the veins on the back of my left hand, and my knuckles on that hand are poorly defined. Crap. I have a call in to the doctor to see what must be done; it seems that waiting another day isn't such a good idea any more. Hopefully it's just a minor infection ("cellulitis" I think it's called) that can be completely cured with antibiotics...but I will not panic until I am given reason to do so! THANK YOU to Gretchen for giving me some "real world" things to look for so that I knew to follow up.
Insertion here: I just got a call from the nurse at my oncologist's office. She said they'll take a look at me tomorrow, as the next 24 hours won't make a difference. I'm concerned, but we'll just have to see how it goes.
Today has been a full mommy day. I have vowed that on Mondays and Tuesdays, my "best" chemo cycle days, that I will do the maximum possible with and for Tessa, since on the other days I am so comparably low energy, and since I'm so crabby and tired in the evenings especially. (Picture me lying in bed, flipping through bad TV channels, unable to sleep, and telling Tessa "Go find Daddy!" in a grouchy voice, starting between 5pm and 7pm most days. UGH. This is not my best vision of myself, but there it is.) Anyway, today we took Tessa and her friend Derek to the zoo, and we had a marvelous time. Both kids were fabulous, and loved one another's company... as well as the excitement of the zoo, of course. Afterwards, the four of us went to Red Mill Burgers and treated ourselves to really good burgers... decadent, unhealthy, but oh so tasty! It was a great morning, and a good time was had by all.
Tessa didn't nap, which is par for the course these days. At 3:30 we'll head to PEPS, and then we've been invited to dinner at the Huycke's, which we are really looking forward to. A lovely day.
Tomorrow is number 9 of 16. My mom is taking Tessa, and Ryan is getting a chance to go for a bike ride and do some things on his own; Michele (who is using precious time while her MIL takes care of Elliott) is going to take me to chemo, where we will meet Lori (who is using precious vacation time to attend chemo with me), and the three of us will talk about fundraising options for the 3 Day Walk. I hope that tomorrow will be uneventful in terms of the chemo itself, and that despite the clinical setting, I will be able to fully enjoy the company of my girlfriends.
Love to all,
Kristina
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5 comments:
Kristina,
Sounds like you and Tessa had a grand Mommy Day!! The burgers sound yummy.
HUGS for the hard days. I thought of you many times as I lay sick last week wondering how you do it. I can't even imagine, but I have all the HUGS I can give.
I will be praying for you tomorrow. I hope your day with your friends is rejuvenating dispite the location.
There is no 3-day walk here. Is there a way to fund raise for you since there isn't a walk here? I have friends who are breast ca survivors that I'm sure would join in.
HUGS,
Rhonda (twinangel)
Just an ovusofter sending you my best regards and prayers. Glad you are feeling a little more upbeat than a couple weeks ago.
Karen (Kethry)
Keep us informed, sweetie. Lymphedema is no picnic, but it's totally treatable and manageable. (Yeah, right, she says...like that's gonna make me feel better.)
Tessa is so blessed to have a mommy who can plan for full mommy days.
Love & remember those sparkly-eyed women -- you, too, in time.
gr
You are Such and Awesome MOM! Even in physical & emotional turmol you put her first. Grouchy is okay...it happens. And only a few hours a day? WOW! My hat is off to you, Kristina.
Thank goodness for the friends who are by your side, and for gr's constant support and advice! It is reasuring to know that you are in loving and knowledgable hands. I will be waiting anxiously to hear the results of your hand swelling. Hopefully, you do not have any treatment set backs as a result.
Keeping you in my prayers.
Corina
Hi Kristina
Just found your blog while surfing lymphedema. I am a multiple cancer survivor (2 lymphomas) and hereditary lymphedema.
Concerned as you mentioned the possibility of cellulitis. If you at all suspect this infection, please do try and get to a doctor today.
These infections are disasterous for lymphedema - and will make the condition much worse. Twenty-four hours can make a major difference.
My very best to you.
Pat O'Connor
Lymphedema People - website
My Life with Lymphedema - Blogspot blog
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